Just out of the clear blue, Chap - given his first real opportunity with his trike in our driveway - has been "peddlin'" non stop! He is like a little motorman, steering and peddling! He rides to our neighbors' driveway and back - down the sidewalk. Yes, Chap! Leaving our driveway!! (With permission, of course). Whit can do it if he puts his mind to it. It is much easier for him to "edle" with his feet on the ground, rather than on the peddles. So, that's the route he chooses most of the time. If he gives himself a running start and is going down hill, and can get the right footwork and rhythm going... he peddles. Many times - all of that is too much to think about, when he can just push with his feet.
We've been going on nightly bike rides through our neighborhood. Corbett and I each have a bike with a seat on the back, and Maggie rides her's. She still has her training wheels on, but is so close to having them taken off. Corbett raised them up, so they're not level with her back wheels, so she has to do a balancing act to keep them off of the ground. We have been practicing this act on our long rides, and she is doing a great job! I think she could do it, but lacks the confidence without those extra wheels.
Our driveway looks like a circus these days - three different sized bikes, three different speeds, and three different directions. Kind of like my daily life... only there are a few more directions and speeds thrown in there sometimes... and, well worth the journey!
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Amazing Things
God has done some pretty amazing things in my life.
One of them, is having the courage and vulnerability to post on this blog. It kind of helps me to not know when you are reading this - and to not know your thoughts of me as you are reading this. Yes, there is a counter at the bottom of the page, and it amazes and scares me to no end the number of people that have read this blog. I have gotten emails from friends, family, and even strangers about the blog. I find it hard to wrap my mind around the fact that so many are interested in what I have to write. So, I usually just try not to. Because if I did get my mind wrapped around that fact... I may not write anymore! :o)
When I was in high school, I hated it! I was miserable. I was actively involved in golf, volleyball, mascot (that way I could be hidden... hmm... and we wonder where Chap gets it!), but those activities just helped me from facing the misery my heart was feeling. It wasn't until at Baylor that I truly found God's purpose for my life, and the will within myself to succeed. That is not to say that I still do not struggle with those insecurities. It is still a daily struggle, but the way God has shown himself in my life recently is what leads me to write and share myself.
My pregnancy with "the brothers" was filled with some of the most devastating days I have ever faced - way worse than high school days! God has shown me through life experiences and the blessings he has provided me, that I can't keep it all to myself. He showed me that I am loved to no end by Him and so many others. God revealed Himself to me during that pregnancy and the days and months afterward.
This is our miracle baby...
A little more perspective...
This is the size diaper he is wearing in that picture compared to the size he wears today...
It is often said it is the struggles in life that bring us closer to God and provide the best testimonies. I've had plenty of struggles in life - most of them within myself. But when I look at this miraculous struggle and am a witness to the amazing hand of God - I have to share it. It is only a small piece of me, but a huge piece of my heart! So, I write...
One of them, is having the courage and vulnerability to post on this blog. It kind of helps me to not know when you are reading this - and to not know your thoughts of me as you are reading this. Yes, there is a counter at the bottom of the page, and it amazes and scares me to no end the number of people that have read this blog. I have gotten emails from friends, family, and even strangers about the blog. I find it hard to wrap my mind around the fact that so many are interested in what I have to write. So, I usually just try not to. Because if I did get my mind wrapped around that fact... I may not write anymore! :o)
When I was in high school, I hated it! I was miserable. I was actively involved in golf, volleyball, mascot (that way I could be hidden... hmm... and we wonder where Chap gets it!), but those activities just helped me from facing the misery my heart was feeling. It wasn't until at Baylor that I truly found God's purpose for my life, and the will within myself to succeed. That is not to say that I still do not struggle with those insecurities. It is still a daily struggle, but the way God has shown himself in my life recently is what leads me to write and share myself.
My pregnancy with "the brothers" was filled with some of the most devastating days I have ever faced - way worse than high school days! God has shown me through life experiences and the blessings he has provided me, that I can't keep it all to myself. He showed me that I am loved to no end by Him and so many others. God revealed Himself to me during that pregnancy and the days and months afterward.
This is our miracle baby...
A little more perspective...
This is the size diaper he is wearing in that picture compared to the size he wears today...It is often said it is the struggles in life that bring us closer to God and provide the best testimonies. I've had plenty of struggles in life - most of them within myself. But when I look at this miraculous struggle and am a witness to the amazing hand of God - I have to share it. It is only a small piece of me, but a huge piece of my heart! So, I write...
Saturday, March 14, 2009
"He's Growin' Up!"
We had another weigh-in for Whit last night. I've never watched it, but have seen the advertisements for the show on TV - "The Biggest Loser."
Well, last night we had the opposite. When Whit was discharged from the NICU, we bought some baby scales - and they convert into toddler scales. So, we have weigh-ins to find "The Biggest Gainer." Our hope is always that it will be Whit!
Since we have started Whit on his appetite stimulant, our hope has become reality! Last night, Chap was first. He said, "My turn..." So, he stepped on the scales, and it read 30 lbs 5 1/2 oz. Then, came Whit... as soon as he stepped on the scales, and we heard the drum roll in our minds - it read Lo batt...
So, we changed the battery and tried again. He weighed 21 lbs 10 oz!! He has gained 3 lbs in 3 weeks! Maggie weighed 38 lbs 3 oz. Whit became our "Biggest Gainer."
As Whit stood on the scales, and we were thrilled with his gain, Maggie said, "He's growin' up!!"
Well, last night we had the opposite. When Whit was discharged from the NICU, we bought some baby scales - and they convert into toddler scales. So, we have weigh-ins to find "The Biggest Gainer." Our hope is always that it will be Whit!
Since we have started Whit on his appetite stimulant, our hope has become reality! Last night, Chap was first. He said, "My turn..." So, he stepped on the scales, and it read 30 lbs 5 1/2 oz. Then, came Whit... as soon as he stepped on the scales, and we heard the drum roll in our minds - it read Lo batt...
So, we changed the battery and tried again. He weighed 21 lbs 10 oz!! He has gained 3 lbs in 3 weeks! Maggie weighed 38 lbs 3 oz. Whit became our "Biggest Gainer."
As Whit stood on the scales, and we were thrilled with his gain, Maggie said, "He's growin' up!!"
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Like Me
Chap doesn’t get talked about much – whether because of his “middle child state” or because he is the quiet and reserved one. However, I love watching his mind work, and build trust in people and things. (Yes, things… he has been scared of a chip bag blowing in the wind in our driveway before… thinking it was out to get him!)
Like me, Chap doesn’t let people into his world very easily, and only a handful have tickets.
I wish many times that others could see his brightness, his insight, and his gentleness – that he would let others see in him what we see in him! Instead, he usually hides behind me avoiding conversation and eye contact with anyone: afterall, if he doesn’t look at them… they can’t see him, right?
Like me, Chap doesn’t like to see others hurt.
It is my desire to fix people when they are in pain and hurting. I hate seeing people suffer, and will do anything to make it go away. The problem is, that sometimes (actually, most of the time) I can’t fix it. But that usually doesn’t stop me from trying, or carrying the pain in my heart as well.
The other day, we arrived to school a bit early. We are usually the first to arrive, and the kids have the “run” of the area for a bit. As people begin to trickle in, Chap gets closer and closer to my side – many times ending up in my lap. However, this day was a bit different. A mom walked in with a crying infant (along with her preschooler, too). The mom sat down on the floor, and put the infant carrier on the floor next to her.
After a few seconds of the continued crying, Chap slipped out of my lap – never looking back, and just went to sit by the carrier. He still didn’t make eye contact with anyone, but for just a few moments, this quiet and reserved 2 year old stepped out of his comfort zone for a ‘hurting’ baby. He wanted to fix it. He didn’t like the suffering.
The moment was fleeting, as it came time to go into their classes. But my heart beamed with pride. I’m not even sure that any one else noticed (much to Chap’s liking), but I did. He didn’t have to say anything… he didn’t have to do anything… he just sat there… and the baby stopped crying.
That made such an impression on me tonight. Chap, in his stillness once more… just sitting, leaning against Amy’s pregnant tummy… made a sweet little baby boy… a miracle… move around and kick (and claim his territory).
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Twins
We have never really daily verbally referred to the boys as "twins." Maggie dubbed them as "The Brothers" not long after they were born, and we have stuck with that.
While the look nothing alike, and act nothing like - they still have some rather "twinny" moments sometimes. (Yes, I know that is not a real word!)
When I was pregnant, I heard that when twins (or other fraternal multiples) get older, they play with curtains between them, and this simulates how they were in the womb - with a thin layer of amniotic lining between them. They did this yesterday. It was fun to watch! They also did it in other forms yesterday - between a window, and then between playground equipment with holes in the floor. Yes, some of it was probably a kind of anticipatory game - but the curtain game was different. Amazing!
Then, we were eating lunch yesterday. Whit was saying something, and I was having a hard time understanding what he was saying. I didn't have any visual cues, because I knew it wasn't about the choo choo that he was making with his pizza bites, nor was it about eating. He kept repeating his phrase, and each time I tried harder and harder to understand his key word. He was saying "Where my .......?" I had no context clues, and nothing was fitting what he would be looking for at that time. I told him, "I'm sorry, I don't know what you're looking for." He'd repeat it. "I'm sorry, I don't understand you." He repeated it one more time. "Whit, I don't know where it is!" (Hoping this would at least get his mind off of it so that he'd eat!) Then, Chap looked at me and said, "Whit say where his TRAILER!" He emphasized trailer as if - you are crazy... don't you understand your own son!? Then, Whit said - "Trailer!" Yeah! Mystery solved! Thanks, Chap!
And then, there was this moment...
Won't they make sweet daddies one day? Shhh... don't tell Maggie, though! They have "her brothers" - aptly named Chap and Whit - babies that Corbett and I gave her when the "real brothers" were born. They have remained two of her favorites! I can also use it as collateral later in life, don't you think!! With all of that pink surrounding them!
While the look nothing alike, and act nothing like - they still have some rather "twinny" moments sometimes. (Yes, I know that is not a real word!)
When I was pregnant, I heard that when twins (or other fraternal multiples) get older, they play with curtains between them, and this simulates how they were in the womb - with a thin layer of amniotic lining between them. They did this yesterday. It was fun to watch! They also did it in other forms yesterday - between a window, and then between playground equipment with holes in the floor. Yes, some of it was probably a kind of anticipatory game - but the curtain game was different. Amazing!
Then, we were eating lunch yesterday. Whit was saying something, and I was having a hard time understanding what he was saying. I didn't have any visual cues, because I knew it wasn't about the choo choo that he was making with his pizza bites, nor was it about eating. He kept repeating his phrase, and each time I tried harder and harder to understand his key word. He was saying "Where my .......?" I had no context clues, and nothing was fitting what he would be looking for at that time. I told him, "I'm sorry, I don't know what you're looking for." He'd repeat it. "I'm sorry, I don't understand you." He repeated it one more time. "Whit, I don't know where it is!" (Hoping this would at least get his mind off of it so that he'd eat!) Then, Chap looked at me and said, "Whit say where his TRAILER!" He emphasized trailer as if - you are crazy... don't you understand your own son!? Then, Whit said - "Trailer!" Yeah! Mystery solved! Thanks, Chap!
And then, there was this moment...
Won't they make sweet daddies one day? Shhh... don't tell Maggie, though! They have "her brothers" - aptly named Chap and Whit - babies that Corbett and I gave her when the "real brothers" were born. They have remained two of her favorites! I can also use it as collateral later in life, don't you think!! With all of that pink surrounding them!
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Stuck
You know those things that just get stuck in your head and you just can't seem to get them out?
I can remember certain things as a child - vividly. I remember riding a little three wheeler in a pasture by our house, and running one wheel upon an ant hill - and flipping it!
The thing about this story that made the biggest impression on me wasn't the wreck, it wasn't the fact that I had been responsible for injuring my cousin, nor was it the pain from a broken arm. It came with kindergarten assignments. Since it was my right arm that was broken, I was forced to use my left hand to write. All of my papers that I got back during that time had sad faces on them; with the words MESSY written on them. I was only 6, and NOT left handed. It has forever been stuck in my mind.
Tonight, I was going through Maggie's Pre-K assignments with her. Her teacher sends home a stack every week or so, and Maggie, Corbett, and I always look through them - reviewing what she has learned. She loves this, and to be honest... so do Corbett and I! Well, tonight, as we were looking through her stack... we saw this...
If you are having trouble reading the hand-written word... it reads "Hurricane"
Stuck!!
That event is forever engrained in her memory. The kids and I evacuated to my parents' house for the hurricane. Some might say going to Southeast Texas with the hurricane coming was not a smart choice. I would have to agree! I, myself, would like to erase it from my memory. But, for her... it is her therapy. After all, IKE : the FIRST word (other than her name and her brothers' names) that she learned to spell on her own! Her personal dictionary has lengthened with vocabulary, but her favorite word to write is still IKE. A catastrophe that occured 6 months ago, yet just like yesterday in her eyes. We drive down the road sometimes, and if she sees a sign or limb that is not immaculately placed... she blames Ike.
My grandparents' house is almost complete... the renovations are drawing to a close. Maggie saw it last weekend with new carpet, new furniture, new paint, new floors, and things looking more like Ikie's and Papa's house. She has decided that when things are back in place, and it is finished for good... she is throwing an "Open House" party at their home. Hopefully the moments of that night - the dreadfully scary night of the hurricane - will be replaced with a welcome home party for the house she was in that night!
I can remember certain things as a child - vividly. I remember riding a little three wheeler in a pasture by our house, and running one wheel upon an ant hill - and flipping it!
The thing about this story that made the biggest impression on me wasn't the wreck, it wasn't the fact that I had been responsible for injuring my cousin, nor was it the pain from a broken arm. It came with kindergarten assignments. Since it was my right arm that was broken, I was forced to use my left hand to write. All of my papers that I got back during that time had sad faces on them; with the words MESSY written on them. I was only 6, and NOT left handed. It has forever been stuck in my mind.
Tonight, I was going through Maggie's Pre-K assignments with her. Her teacher sends home a stack every week or so, and Maggie, Corbett, and I always look through them - reviewing what she has learned. She loves this, and to be honest... so do Corbett and I! Well, tonight, as we were looking through her stack... we saw this...
If you are having trouble reading the hand-written word... it reads "Hurricane"Stuck!!
That event is forever engrained in her memory. The kids and I evacuated to my parents' house for the hurricane. Some might say going to Southeast Texas with the hurricane coming was not a smart choice. I would have to agree! I, myself, would like to erase it from my memory. But, for her... it is her therapy. After all, IKE : the FIRST word (other than her name and her brothers' names) that she learned to spell on her own! Her personal dictionary has lengthened with vocabulary, but her favorite word to write is still IKE. A catastrophe that occured 6 months ago, yet just like yesterday in her eyes. We drive down the road sometimes, and if she sees a sign or limb that is not immaculately placed... she blames Ike.
My grandparents' house is almost complete... the renovations are drawing to a close. Maggie saw it last weekend with new carpet, new furniture, new paint, new floors, and things looking more like Ikie's and Papa's house. She has decided that when things are back in place, and it is finished for good... she is throwing an "Open House" party at their home. Hopefully the moments of that night - the dreadfully scary night of the hurricane - will be replaced with a welcome home party for the house she was in that night!
Monday, March 2, 2009
I Want to Know You More
I've been meaning to write an update, but just haven't had the opportunity (or taken the opportunity) to do so. Plus, I've had "writer's block". Nothing has really jumped out at me this week to "blog" about - until now. I'm sitting here listening to music by Jason Catron - and one of my favorite songs is on... I Want to Know You More. Some day, I want Corbett to sing this song... it is beautiful!
So, that led to my thoughts on this blog...
I want to know you more!
My mind is often carried into the future... wondering what each of my divine miracles will become!
Maggie - the sweet-spirited, eager to please little girl! She aspires to be a doctor or nurse right now. I see her as a Mommy, too. Her tender heart is treasured in mine!
Chap - Such a passionate, shy, and loving little boy. He'd be embarrassed that I'm even talking about him. He'll be a "helper" in some way - ready to lend a hand with whatever is needed. Maggie had a pile of toys to put up tonight, and he ran to her and said, "Can I help?" Such a gentle giver!
Whit - our free-spirited, fun-loving little boy. Whatever he becomes, it will be something where he doesn't have to sit down! I could see him as an engineer, trying to figure out how things work.
Now, lets imagine - they're all the age to play t-ball. Considering the developmental patterns of a 4 year old... here is what I see each of them doing.... Maggie - picking flowers in the outfield, hoping the ball isn't hit to her. She wouldn't want to make someone sad by throwing them out! Chap - catching, with the mask on - hoping no one notices him, and hoping he doesn't make a mistake... for if he does, a meltdown will be in the works. Whit - hmmm. His size has me put him at short stop, or second base. However, his personality has me put him sitting in the dirt, making dirt piles - standing up and jumping on them to flatten them out. His mind is as far from the game as mine usually is while watching baseball!
I Want to Know You More
I love watching them grow, and imagining what they'll become. Tonight, they're sleeping in their beds, with just their sweet dreams - and no worries of tomorrow.
I Want to Know You More!
"Oh, I want to know You more. , deep within my soul, I want to know You! Oh, I want to feel your heart and know your mind. Looking in Your eyes, stirs up within me cries that say, I want to know You. Oh, I want to know You more!
I picture God, our Father, wanting to know US more... and wanting US to know HIM more! What an amazing thought - as I think about how much I want to know my children!
So, that led to my thoughts on this blog...
I want to know you more!
My mind is often carried into the future... wondering what each of my divine miracles will become!
Maggie - the sweet-spirited, eager to please little girl! She aspires to be a doctor or nurse right now. I see her as a Mommy, too. Her tender heart is treasured in mine!
Chap - Such a passionate, shy, and loving little boy. He'd be embarrassed that I'm even talking about him. He'll be a "helper" in some way - ready to lend a hand with whatever is needed. Maggie had a pile of toys to put up tonight, and he ran to her and said, "Can I help?" Such a gentle giver!
Whit - our free-spirited, fun-loving little boy. Whatever he becomes, it will be something where he doesn't have to sit down! I could see him as an engineer, trying to figure out how things work.
Now, lets imagine - they're all the age to play t-ball. Considering the developmental patterns of a 4 year old... here is what I see each of them doing.... Maggie - picking flowers in the outfield, hoping the ball isn't hit to her. She wouldn't want to make someone sad by throwing them out! Chap - catching, with the mask on - hoping no one notices him, and hoping he doesn't make a mistake... for if he does, a meltdown will be in the works. Whit - hmmm. His size has me put him at short stop, or second base. However, his personality has me put him sitting in the dirt, making dirt piles - standing up and jumping on them to flatten them out. His mind is as far from the game as mine usually is while watching baseball!
I Want to Know You More
I love watching them grow, and imagining what they'll become. Tonight, they're sleeping in their beds, with just their sweet dreams - and no worries of tomorrow.
I Want to Know You More!
"Oh, I want to know You more. , deep within my soul, I want to know You! Oh, I want to feel your heart and know your mind. Looking in Your eyes, stirs up within me cries that say, I want to know You. Oh, I want to know You more!
I picture God, our Father, wanting to know US more... and wanting US to know HIM more! What an amazing thought - as I think about how much I want to know my children!
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